


these are oddest things that happen between soulmates

by grumpysimon



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Basically, College!AU, F/M, M/M, Mostly Fluff, Stanford!Era
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-07-15
Updated: 2014-07-15
Packaged: 2018-02-08 04:58:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,257
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1927488
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grumpysimon/pseuds/grumpysimon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam leaves for Stanford- and instead of Dean letting him go, this time he chases after him. Because maybe, at the same time, the both of them are realizing that it is love that they are feeling.</p>
            </blockquote>





	these are oddest things that happen between soulmates

**Author's Note:**

> I'M SORRY ALL I DO IS PUBLISH NEW FICS AND NEVER FINISH ANY AJSNGJNSJG  
> but anyway, here's the new wincest fic i've been obsessing over. feel free to comment, i need your constructive criticism and i love hearing what you think!

  
Dean won't sat he loves you. He's the kind of guy that's there for the fuck and he'll be gone by the morning. He believes that love is just a concept of the mind that people invent to blind themselves from their own hardships. In fact, he'll say he's never fallen for anyone at all. To him, there's no point in saying he's fallen in love, because it's not real. And if love is real, it's all been said before. You'll hear it a million times in the movies, people throwing the words of "i love you," like those are words to be wasted on anyone. You'll hear it at a fancy restaurant, exchanged between a couple that's been dating for something under a week. Three words that would've had so very much meaning if the human race hadn't wasted them. Maybe it's because something had already broken inside of him, something that would forever keep him from falling ever again. There's always going to be a story behind something as broken as that.  


~**************~ 

  
The night that Sam left for Stanford, as Dean would always say, was one of the worst nights of his life. Sam would keep it in his mind as his first night of liberation, and it to him would be something that kept him going. The night was purely starless and the wind howled, cloaking John's drunken yelling so it was only heard in the confines of the Winchester family's motel room. Neither Dean nor John knew that the purely starless night was going to be the last time the both of them would see Sam for a long time.

Sam had been breaking for a great deal of time. John's sharp words wore at Sam, like waves that crashed endlessly at wind-weathered boards on a beach. Sam had witnessed nightmares that the rest of the unknowing world would never dream about; and he didn't want to watch his brother or his father celebrate killing another monster again. If there was a life meant out there for Sam, it definitely wasn't this.

Sam knew he was smart. He'd been told by enough teachers to know that he had potential. And he didn't want to help people by hunting monsters, but he still wanted to help people. He wanted to be a lawyer, and he wanted to meet a nice girl. He wanted to free himself from this. He didn't want to be the freak anymore. He didn't want to know how to shoot a gun and he didn't want to own his very own personal knife collection. Sam was going to live the apple pie life that he always had been dreaming of. There was no more drunken John and no more constant fighting.

But out of every good situation comes something bad. He would be leaving Dean. There was always something of him lingering in the back of Sam's mind. He was the oldest of John Winchester's sons, and he was the bravest. One of the most talented hunters. And he was so very broken. The Winchesters weren't the type to believe in heroes; most hunters didn't. They were their own heroes. That was what made Sam so very different from John and Dean. He couldn't be his own hero, and he only held one hero in his mind, ever since he was very young. Sam's hero was the same boy who carried him out of the burning frame of their house the night that they lost it all. The same boy who cared for him and loved him unconditionally because John could not. The same boy who wore the necklace that Sam had given him every day, and never took it off. The same boy who took the beatings from John that would've been meant from Sam. He always kept Dean as his only hero.

But the night that Sam left for Stanford, he decided that he had to become his own hero. He had to let his heroes go. Sam had to free himself from his family, from who he was to end up to be if he stayed. He was similar to every teenager in that he held constant fear of becoming like his father. Sam didn't want to end up like John; he didn't want to become an abusive, broken drunk that dragged his sons down with him.  
  
Sam wanted to take to the road, and instead of lingering on the road behind him like he had for his life, he wanted to gaze hopefully upon the road before him. Ever since he was young, he'd always felt somewhat unclean, and it never seemed to go away. He'd never known why, and there was something cleansing in escaping being a Winchester.  
So he left. In the middle of the night, he pulled out his carefully packed bag from under his bed, and took one last look at Dean. He always slept like the dead. Sam wasn't going to cry. This was something grand- and it was a gift. He was finally leaving, and then he would be free. Sam wasn't going to think of everything that happened between himself and Dean, the things that had happened when John was gone on a hunt. 

  
There's a feeling that one feels when they are at their greatest moment of pain, a feeling that could be only described as if someone had dumped a wheelbarrow of bricks on one's own heart. The heaviness in one's heart begins to change the heart, as small hairline fractures begin to spread throughout their heart. It's not a broken heart yet, but that's the feeling of the beginning of a heart shattering.

  
Sam felt traces of that feeling as he left; but as the motel faded into spots in the distance, Sam felt the weights on him that had been there for oh so long beginning to lift. Night brings hope for many people, a promise of a new day and a fresh sun to shine on your face. The night is cleansing and it freed Sam, and as he passed out of civilization into the places where not a soul resided, the stars that had been concealed began to reveal themselves.  


~**************~

  


  
When Sam was young and his father had them in a new school every month, Sam never had much chance to connect with neither students nor teachers. But occasionally they would stay longer at schools when John's hunts were more complicated. That, of course, would give Dean more opportunity to hook up with every girl in the school and for teachers and principals to realize Sam's potential.

John was never supportive of when teachers called to comment on Sam's intelligence or talk about some type of competition or debate that they wanted him to be involved in. John would get angry and lash out at the person who had only called with hope that Sam could have a chance. After one of those phone calls, John would be sure to have the hunt completed and them out of that town within the next three days.

At one point, a principal who saw something unique in Sam had decided to call John. She remarked on how well he was doing for a new student and offered to enter him in some sort of miscellaneous Competition for Smart Children. John became so angry with the woman's remarks, and that night resulted in a nasty fight. That, Sam would come to realize, that Sam finally decided he would have to leave, and as soon as possible. 


End file.
